Congratulations on your short story, here's one of the stories leading off the AGU meeting:

8am Monday morning
AN: S11A-0194

A New Seismic Phase with Ray Parameter = 0: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLL!!!

Lofton, K M, Euler, G G, Wiens, D A, Tibi, R, Shore, P, Nyblade, A, Larson, A M, Nnange, J M, Ateba, B, Tabod, C, Tokam, A

Simultaneous, high-frequency arrivals seemingly unassociated with earthquake activity were recorded on seismometers of the Cameroon Seismic Array (CSA) from January to February, 2006. The CSA is a temporary deployment, initially installed in January of 2005 with 8 stations and expanded to 32 stations after one year, that will continue to record until January 2007. The seismometer spacing is on average about 150 km and is confined to the United Republic of Cameroon. The array is primarily intended to aid in resolving upper mantle and crustal features associated with the Cameroon Volcanic Line. The phase in question exhibits a ray parameter of near zero, onsetting nearly simultaneously at most stations of the array. However, no corresponding earthquake sources have been identified in teleseismic catalogs and no phases with non-zero ray parameter are recorded near the time of the arrivals. The associated arrivals are confined to periods less than 0.5s, have both horizontal and vertical motion, show no waveform coherency except in duration, and have considerable variation in amplitude across the array. Among groups of arrivals, variation is observed in average amplitude, coda duration, temporal spacing, and the number of recording stations. Extensive temporal analysis indicates two levels of clustering: dense clustering within a span of a few hours and clustering of all noted arrivals within a period of roughly 2 weeks. Inspection of an atmospheric or solar relationship showed no significant correlation.

However, investigation of anthropogenic activity led to a perfect correlation: the timing of the phases is confined to the period of televised Cameroonian soccer matches during the 2006 African Cup of Nations and the onset of the signals coincide with the kicking of a Cameroonian football into the opponent's goal.