Magnitude: 3.2 - 4.0
From: 11/15/05 6:07PM PST - To: 11/20/05 Midnight PST
Location: Parkfield, CA
Lat: 35.94N - Long: 120.54W - Range: 45 kms km

Hi Don,

Remember how I was telling you about that Moose Drool Beer my girlfriend had. Well, try as I might, she won't give it up. So this is what I want you to do. You have to pack and go down to Parkfield. This earthquake should be really close to town, so I want you to camp out near the bridge. Mind you, not under the bridge, but near it. You gotta be out in the clear. So you're gonna take enough stuff so you can hang out for five days. See, that will be Wednesday, Thursday, Friday hopefully the quake will arrive, but if not, then you have two more days after Friday, you see. Saturday and Sunday and you can go home on Monday. But no sooner than Monday, unless the earthquake arrives first. If it arrives first, then you can either stay because you want to, or you can go home.

Now, you have your tent, lights, camera, maps, books, papers to read and a radio with your cell phone. You're gonna take one drinking glass with you to use as your seismometer. When you get all set up, you can fill it half way up with water, so you can see when an earthquake happens. Make sure the table legs are real firm on the ground, ok? Don't forget to get a box of Twinkies.

This time, you're gonna do something entirely new. I want you to catch the quake as it goes through. So you need to get three canning jars with those lids that you fasten down and they have a real tight seal. So after you get all set up, you're gonna have 3 jars on the table with your glass of water. Each jar should be of a different size. A small one, a medium size one and a large one. I want you to put my prediction in the medium sized jar. Some might say it belongs in the small jar, but hey, you'll do it the way I want it, right?

Now, those jars have a hinge on one side and you can leave the fastening end unfastened until the earthquake arrives. When you feel the ground move, you're to open all the lids at once and hit the stop watch and make it start running. If the quake is small, close the lid on the smallest jar before the earthquake stops. Do the same if it's a medium sized quake or a large one. Don't worry about the other two. Ok, so you open the lids when the quake starts and before it stops you close the lid of the size that matches the earthquake. Hopefully, it will be the one that has my prediction in it. Otherwise, Roger's Best Fit Program won't work well.

I'll call Linda at the Parkfield Café and tell her to bring you lunch and dinner. You can pack a few things for a quick breakfast and don't forget the instant coffee and easy does it on the Corona Beer. Don't drink Dos Equis, Heinekins or any of those other beers. It might be bad luck, you know. Oh, I just remembered, you have to remember to pack the stop watch, unless it's already on your wristwatch, but be careful, don't get caught up in details and forget your mission.

So let's suppose you have captured the earthquake in the medium sized jar. I do not want you to take it over SAFOD and give it to those guys. I want you to take it to Menlo Park and give it to the one that has that cute name for me. You tell him, I said to open the jar very carefully. You see, we won't know if you captured the earthquake and put it in there, it might get out. And then the other part is that if there is something in the jar that causes rain, we don't want it to rain in his office. That might not be cool.

Since this is a true scientific experiment, this is another thing you need to do. Put my prediction in the medium sized jar and it says, 3.2 to 4.0. Put a tag in the little jar that says <3.2 and for the big jar, put in a tag that says >4.1. Then there won't be any mixing up which sized earthquake you caught in any of the jars. Got that, 3 jars, 3 sizes, 3 sizes of earthquakes, but you only get a few seconds to catch it, fasten down that jar and pack it in your car like it was the most valuable thing you ever owned. It is. It's an earthquake in a jar. Who has one of those? You'll be the only one.

Oh, I almost forgot, don't let any animals near the jars. I don't want them to contaminate the earthquake when you catch it. The jars have to be free of animal hair, bugs and the like. If you see Zima's boyfriend tell him Lowell says hello. If it's a wild dog, just shoot it. But leave the ground squirrels alone.

Happy Hunting Don! I'll be by the phone as much as I can, but on Saturday I gotta go do my turkey thing. Let's hope it arrives much sooner.

Petra